Those Crazy Malaysians!

Hmmm...can anyone provide me with some sort of social or cultural context to understand why cutting off one's own penis is a successful retort to accusations of infidelity?

Maybe the dude just wanted to be a lady. Perhaps it really is just that simple.

Hello Xenophobia!

First the dumb immigration shit (which, btw, is getting even more ridiculous. The senate passed a bill on the mega-fence earlier this week, then outdid themselves by passing an 'English-Only' amendement yesterday. I need to continue my search for a new party), and now this. God I hope the Beeb got this one wrong.

Anyone Remember This?

I guess it's all this WTC talk that made me remember it.

Brain Food and Eye Candy

Two links for y'all. The first item of note is that the trailer for Oliver Stone's September 11th flick Ground Zero America: World Trade Center was released today and can be seen here. Unfortunately my Quicktime setup is on the fritz right now, so I can't comment on it yet.

The second item is a bit longer but of more substance. It is the video of last weekend's edition of NOW with David Brancaccio, formerly Bill Moyers' show. On this episode, which clocks in at just over 90 mins, they host a town hall debate about immigration reform. After having listened to it, I was amazed at how clearly some of the real issues began to shine through. I think you will all find it as enlightening as I did. You can get it as a podcast thru iTunes (it's the May 12th episode), or watch the video here.

Baseball and Immigration

MLB owns...well, everything! I find this entire article preposterous. The fact that MLB is trying to say that they own numbers produced by the players? What kind of nonsense is this. Is there even merit to this case? MLB, as much as I love baseball, has got very little going for it. The World Series has seen a steady decline since it's first broadcast. Fantasy Baseball is what's keepin em alive, and the few baseball fans left. Alienate us some more, will ya? What's next, no more signs holding up numbers in the stands? Or maybe we can if we pay MLB a dollar for each number used. For some reason I don't see the Boston fans paying money to scream "Two Thousand" when the Yanks are at Fenway.

Bush thinks he knows about immigration. He really does. Bush's speech states that they're gonna send a few thousand troops to the Mexican border to curb immigration. Yes, because that is what this country needs. Less people that will work and do the work the white man refuses to. When was the last time you saw a white dude working in a Deli? Stealing our jobs my ass. Hey Bush. How about you scrap the INS. I'm serious. Take it from a fucking immigrant. The INS blows. They operate at an antiquated speed and with an antiquated process. They ask for way too much money in order to become a citizen. The Greencard process is crap. People will work and live in this country for 10 years before they can attempt to get a Greencard. That and I'm pretty sure the National Guard has better things to do than protect our border with Mexico. Just about everything dealing with the INS and immigration is wrong. For a country made of immigrants, we really seem to not like them.

My Bad...Not Exactly

Alright. Let me first apologize for this post, as I hate to use this space to editorialize -- wait, what the fuck am I talking about? I always editorialize here. Let me clarify. I don't typically like to use this space to editorialize about my own life, but I will break that trend for once.

As of today, I am no longer an auto accident virgin. On my way home from work, I was clipped by some fucker in a sports car -- a cream, late-model Nissan 300ZX to be exact. Here's what happened: I'm approaching an intersection in the left turn lane. As I approach the intersection, there is a side street off to the right. In fact, here's a map of the area. I'm traveling south on Orange Grove, and the side street is Arroyo Terrace. So as I approach the intersection, I am the only person in the left turn lane. In addition, I cannot see the side street as there are large cars (read suburban tanks) waiting for the red light. Suddenly, I see a cream colored Nissan 300ZX pulling out, making a left turn from Arroyo onto Orange Grove. Naturally, I lay on my horn, but does our antihero stop? Fuck no. As I lay on my brakes, he floors it. My beauty was hit on the passenger side rear wheel, quarter panel, and passenger door. And I'm fairly certian he was accelerating, as his leather fender bra was wedged into my rear passenger wheel, between the rim and the tire.

So there I am, car turned perpendicular to traffic, trying futily to get out of the road onto the side street and assess the damage. That, of course, was a task in and of itself. As the kind folk in the southbound lane were stopped waiting to let me go, some other cocksucker in a fucking Beamer drives around one of the stopped cars and onto the side street trying to get around, and almost hits me. Boy, I could have kicked him in the fucking teeth. Now mind you, I'm still trying to keep an eye on the dude who swiped me. As I'm pulling on to the side street, I see him sitting in his car about a block away and then, like that...he's gone. (BTW, I'll give One American Dollar to the first person to name the movie that's from). I repeat for dramatic effect: THIS PUSSY MOTHERFUCKER LEFT THE GODDAMNED SCENE. So there I am, trying to figure out who to yell at, feeling completely helpless. Some people come out from their houses to see if I'm OK, which kinda made me feel good. But of course, no witnesses. I call the police and sit...and wait...and wait...and wait. As I'm waiting, two guys come back to tell me that they saw the accident. In fact, one dude was at the intersection going north on Orange Grove and fucking followed this dickless cock for a couple blocks, but lost him when the dude kicked in the juice. In this guys words:

He was real eager to get the fuck away from here.

The funny part about it was that when the cop got there, he chided the guy for following him.

Guy: I followed him for a couple blocks, but couldn't get close enough to get a plate.
Cop: Yea, that's not the part of town where you want to be following somebody to.

So oh well I guess. Now I'm stuck with 1) a $1K deductible staring me in the face, 2) higher insurance premium, and 3) more insurance, police, and DMV paperwork than I want to think about.

Now I'm pissed, but I'm not really sure what the worst part is. I think I'd feel a lot better if that litte piece of shit waste of human flesh motherfucker who hit me hadn't run like the scared little bitch that I'm sure he is. If there's any justice in this world, he fucking cracked his skull off the windshield.

I know they won't ever see it, but I'm really grateful to the two guys who came back and told me they saw it, and I owe a shitload to the guy who chased this dickhead. Thanks Paul -- I think there's gonna be a bottle of scotch in the mail for him.

And to the lame ass knucklehead who hit me: I've got my eye out for you. In fact, to everyone in the Pasadena area: keep your eyes peeled for a late model, cream or beige Nissan 300ZX with a fucked up front passenger side fender and silver paint marks. If you see him, pull in front of him, get out of your car, and give him the Vulcan Death Grip. Then stuff him in your trunk and bring him to me, and I'll get fucking Hostel on his ass.

The worst part of all of this? I was actually having a good day until this. I suppose I should be happy though: my car's not totalled, and I wasn't hurt. But make no mistake: I still want that dudes' head on a platter.

Things that Make You Go Hmmm....

Let's see...

Poor foreign policy? Yup.

Shortsighted fiscal policy? You bet.

Reckless disregard for human life? Yes and double yes.

Human rights violations? Check.

Civil Rights violations? Damn straight.

This leaves me with only one question: what's next -- Anal rape? Jesus christ!

WARNING: That last link is ABSOLUTELY NSFW. Do not, under any circumstances, open that last link at work.

In fact, don't open that last link at all. I'm not fucking kidding.

Whatever Happened To...

...the immigration debate? Certainly seems to have jumped the shark, if you will.

Guess it wasn't so important after all.

Entropia Universe

First read the article. I discovered this yesterday while looking for the NYTimes review bashing IE (if you've never used or seen any other browser, then you'll love the new IE). First article in the Tech section was about an MMO, Project Entropia or Entropia Universe.

So I read this article, it's quite nuts. Implications are very fascinating. It's an MMO in the sense, that you log on, you do stuff (kill, mine, etc) and skill up your character in a certain aspect. You can either be a Hunter, a Miner or tackle a specific trade/profession. The game is free (download and to play). Cool. Now here's the kicker, the purpose of the article. You can convert the in-game money to real money. 1 USD is equivalent to 10 of the virtual money. You can deposit money....AND you can withdraw money from an A.T.M. card....Huh? The money I make in this so-called "game" I can use in the real world? There is something very odd about this concept.

The NYTimes' article highlights a single person that invested over 100,000 USD into the virtual world to purchse, then the guiness book holder for largest virtual property purchase, virtual land. He leases out space to stores and charges people to Hunt and Mine on his land. Currently he makes roughly 12,000 USD from this. Okay, now is when I'm taken back.

This has some serious implications. This is the second such article I've read in the past 2 weeks. One detailed a "real-estate" investor that did similar things, in another game. I know people can make money in MMO's, but it's generally been illegal and kinda removes the fun from the game. But now, this is part of the game! People can make this game their job.

This MMO later appeared on Slashdot and that contained a link to another article with more information on BBC. The game itself can be found here.